What Is Lenny Teaching Those Kids in CEC?

You'd Never Believe It If I Didn't Show You

Who is going to care for your pets after you are raptured into heaven?

Many Christians believe that animals do not go to heaven. So when Jesus comes back and you return with him to heaven, will there be somebody to take care of your dog or cat?

If you have a non-Christian family member, they might take care of your pet, but if not, have you made any plans? Imagine being taken to streets of gold while your dog starves to death walking around in his own feces trapped in your small house or apartment, subject to fire and earthquakes or even being eaten by heathens searching for any remaining morsel of food. Do you want that to happen?

With the imminent collapse of the global economy and rampant godlessness, even the community shelters will not have the resources to care for your poor, hungry animals. So you need to make preparations.

That’s what JesusPets is for. We are assembling a community of heathen pet-lovers to care for pets that are “left-behind.” We are coordinating with feed mills and kennels in preparation for your post-apocalyptic pet care needs.

Know Someone Getting "Left Behind?"

Enterprising young athiests have finally decided to stop resisting the Church and begin exploiting the faithful for profit. Those that subscribe to the "Left Behind" series can now sign up for the Post-Rapture Post. I think its funny but they are serious. Here is what they say:

"Do you know someone who is in danger of being "left behind" because of a sinful life? Imagine if you could write a letter to a friend or loved one after the Great Day of Reckoning. Maybe a message to your family telling them to trust in God, and that everything will be okay. Perhaps you would leave instructions to care for your pets after your departure. It could be that your message is the light that opens a sinner's eyes to the Glory of God and allows them entrance to Heaven during the trials before the Second Coming. This is where the Post-Rapture Post comes in. Just write your letter and it will be hand-delivered immediately following the exodus of the pure from the Earth. But you must be thinking to yourself, "How can the letters be delivered after the Rapture?" The answer is simple. The creators of this site are Atheists. That's right, we don't believe in God. How else would we be able to deliver your correspondence after the Rapture? "

Which Super Hero Are You?

You've read the comics, watched the cartoons, own the DVD's. Bought the costumes and maybe even wore the "Underroos". Did you scale the walls, or jump off roofs? Which Superhero are you most like? I took the quiz and found out the Superman is most like Chris. You can call me Super ChriS
You are Superman

Superman 90% Batman 75% Spider-Man 70% Supergirl 70% Hulk 55% Robin 53% Wonder Woman 50% The Flash 50% Green Lantern 50% Iron Man 45% Catwoman 10%

You are mild-mannered, good, strong and you love to help others.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

Just Plain Funny...Not Fightn Words!

I'm a Christ Follower (Mac vs. PC Parody) Part 02

Its All About You...No ME!

REV BOB & THE CLUB GO HUNTING!

Embarassing/Funny Moment In The Prayer Room

Zack Hensley recently posted this very candid blog: Hello friends welcome to the displaced Random Rantings Friday err Sunday… this is actually my favorite post every week, but that’s just me… ok let the randomness begin!
I just picked my nose in the prayer room, and was caught by to girls sitting behind me… awkward!

So what is the most hilarious, funny, akward, or just plain embarassing thing that has ever happened to you in the prayer room?

By the way, Zach's blog is worth add to your RSS reader.

Families During the Holidays

Families During the Holidays

An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing—45 years of misery is enough.""Pop, what are you talking about?" the son asks."We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old man says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts. "I'll take care of this."

She calls Phoenix immediately and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing till I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing."

The old man hangs up the phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says. "They're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own fares. Now what do we do for Christmas?"